Exam Weeks and Empty-Nesting for Friends
The semester is approaching an end, which makes me feel guilty that I am writing this instead of spending each and every minute revising for my exams. But the more I revise, the more stressed I get, so finding a good stopping point is essential for me, and this acts as a good distraction. The semester, or rather the academic year coming to an end also means that everyone is going places for their internships, and most of us will see each other in September, at least the ones that decide to continue the masters.
I do admit that I am looking forward to having an empty campus, right beside the calanques of Marseille, overlooking the beautiful terrains of Provence. But I have to acknowledge the fact that it might get lonely, just like it did during the Christmas break: I had planned to go to Paris with a Swiss friend of mine, but for some reason, our Airbnb got cancelled and hence, the trip got cancelled. So, while everyone was posting pictures on instagram about their vacations, I was sulking here all alone, spending my Christmas all by myself. A reprieve came on the New Year’s eve, when a friend, who had come back from his vacation invited me to have crêpes and play video games with him. But I digress. What I want to say is that I have to make sure this summer, to not repeat the same mistakes I did during my winter break — not leaving my 9 metre square room for days, except for cooking. This is a habit I might have to get rid of.
Funnily enough, I was feeling quite demotivated today, and decided to go on a stroll — I was having the time of my life, humming old songs as loudly as I could since I was alone, or so I thought. Suddenly, right through the bushes, an elderly couple and their dog emerged, and I was caught off-guard. And old French elderly couples being the old French elderly couples that they are, struck up a conversation with me. Their very first question, after the obligatory “bonjour” was, “why are you depressed?'“ and I didn’t know how to respond. I smiled and replied, “I’m not depressed, just demotivated” and they sighed a sigh of relief, saying, “that’s good to know”, and left. I came back home and actually felt motivated enough to study a little more.
This is one of the many pictures I took while on my stroll today.
The exams are indeed stressing me. I am, however, earnestly excited for the exam weeks to be over, so that I can finally go out and meet new people again. This semester has been quite haphazard when it comes to planning, since there were professors getting Covid, or other medical emergencies, and hence having to cancel classes or doing them online. As a consequence, there are some classes that haven’t even begun as yet, with just two weeks remaining until the vacations. It is chaotic, and that does not help me, no matter how many times, or no matter how many professors tell me to not worry, and that everything will be fine. My brain cannot stop spiralling.